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I have never been the type of person

To be able to smile scarlet

And swing my hands in strangers’ palms

While pretending the world is golden.

I don’t understand what love truly is

But I know the answers better than most.

Is that why they come to me

With hands outstretched

Cracks in their stone fingers

And a line etched in a pale face?

I have felt heartache

And I do not know what agony is.

I fluctuate like a glass pane yearlong

Sometimes, no amount of soap can scrub me clean

But on some days I am as clear as water.

I shrink in my frame and yet cling to it

Reflecting yellow sunsets on one side

And breathing patterns on my other.

I can paint a picture of whatever I please

But my canvas is ragged and strained

And what could be beautiful is simply gray.

Gray makes me seasick

Without ever stepping off the gray grass

Lost in a gray sky and gray clouds

And waiting silently for the silver rain.

Silver is a shade of gray

And no amount of pretending changes that.

I whisper beautiful stories I don’t believe

While leading others down paths I’ve never seen

Yet somehow, they make it through,

And the lines on my palms grow longer.

I could never hold a knife

Because the steel and edges hurt my eyes

But I wonder sometimes what the point is.

I am as worn as a century and tired as a flag

Left to whip and snarl in the winds.

Why would somebody waste so much money

On things as trivial as custom stones

When really, it won’t matter once the yellow’s set in

And for all the cost could have just been carpet.

Linoleum might have been a better choice

For it is easier, it is cheaper, it is replaceable

And the flowers can be pretty.

I cannot differentiate between the pansies and the lilies

But I myself must be a rose.

A sleepy, weary, raw-scrubbed rose

Trying to be beautiful in a cold, flat world.

So uh

I was told to post this

I guess this qualifies as a vent?
Obsidia-TGB Featured By Owner Mar 29, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
This is so pretty. <3
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Submitted on
March 29, 2014
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